Flesh: The Intern

The Intern is my summer project gone awry. I feel the need to explain the situation well, pretty much because it is so fucked up I think it should be shared....



1) Boy Meets Girl:
I received an email at CollarMe.com (If you can't tell these would be BDSM personals) from a strange young man. He had seen my account at Alt.com. In an attempt to contact me in a cheaper fashion he came across my Amazon reviews & lists. (Btw, this is what you get for sticking to the same handle everywhere) Now, I'm a potentially interesting, intelligent and kinky person. Finally, he finds my Collar Me account, which can be written to for free. Lucky him.

2) Girl is dumb:
I couldn't help but respond to this interesting young man who seemed to go through a lot of hoops to write me for free. I have paid for this error in judgement.

3) Girl Meets Boy:
Come to find out that said boy is an intern for the same company I work for. Wow, its like karmic. So I agree to have a 'business lunch' with him. I determine the Intern is strange, but intriguing. This is really all it takes to get me to see you again - Be strange & intriguing. I also determine that since he is 5 years my junior this is the perfect Mrs. Robinson-esque summer fling.

4) Girl & Boy, naked:
For whatever reason the first couple attempts at sex have been less than successful. A warning I suggest you heed: If a man ever tells you that once he stopped having sex with his girlfriend to get up and write down a linear algebra equation - RUN! Even if he lost his virginity in a graveyard & has all the potential in the world, you must run!

5) Girl, Boy & Girl:
I only wish I were referring to a threesome. There is something I could get behind. Nope, instead I get a clusterfuck. The Intern mysteriously cancels our Saturday plans to get high & let me seduce him. Come to find out he has an online friend he has known for 2 plus years. As far as he knows said person is a 20 yr old man in Britain. Friday he gets a call from a 17 yr old girl who is in Kentucky on her way to Wisconsin and she would be 'Gabriel' the British guy. So, she shows up & he proceeds to put her up (much to the chagrin of his ultra Christian roommate) fro like 5 days. I tried to explain the ramifications of harboring an underage girl from Florida whose parents don't know where she is at your apartment. The story goes downhill from there including DXM, knife fight scars & her strong desire to kill ducks with her bare hands.

6) Conclusion:
Why me? Even my summer flings end up in mass quantities of drama. Sigh.