Mr. Robinson
I'm going to take a break from the woes of unemployment & go back to another disasterous portion of my existence: My love life.
As usual I was trolling over at Collar Me when I got a chat invite from random guy X. He has tried to talk to me a few times before. I blew him off for one key reason: He lives in New York. I have a complex about New Yorkers. They are always suspiciously drawn to me. I don't mean a little bit. I mean in a way that has me convinced if I were to walk down the streets of NY a mass of men would be hurling themselves at me. This may sound a tad arrogant, but I assure you it has nothing to do with my looks. Outside of thrid world countries men are not likely to lineup for my attentions. That being said I think New Yorkers have a sixth sense about my bitterness. It seems to be the only place where my sarcastic & pessimistic nature is truely appreciated. Go figure.
Back to random guy X...I turn down his chat request only to get an email. This is not wholly uncommon. Submissive men tend to be a lot like stalkers in their level of determination. He simply asked 'Why not?'. I explained my New York phobia & also politely pointed out he is 4o (making him approximately 14 years my senior). This was not even remotely effective in diswaying him. In an attempt to dodge my NY issues he announced that he had actually just moved back there from silicon valley. I have a severe weakness for northern California. It is the only place you can hit a winery and a leather shop in the same afternoon.
And so begins the story of Mr. Robinson...
We began chatting about a month ago. I talk to lots of people online & don't think much of it. It's like cheap entertainment. However, much to my chagrin this one managed to hold my interest.
Here is what I know so far: He is attractive, a Jewish Atheist, a hot shot salesman who is well off & a Princeton graduate. He majored in physics, used to play competitive chess, never married, one daughter who just started college, loves to travel & he can cook (A major turn on for those of us who grew up mastering the fine art of microwaving). Oh yeah and kinky. There are a bunch of other things, but those are the basics.
Our first phone conversation was 5 hours long. He was in Hong Kong at the end of October & bought me a present. He wanted to fly me out to New York. I passed for now. I prefer disaster happen on my own turf. He is seriously too good to be true, but I have yet to find 'the catch' so to speak. As my best friend pointed out I've gotten mooney over him.
The problem is I don't want to be mooney over him. I want to hate him & leave him in New York. This is not what is happening. Quite the contrary actually. We have a lot in common, he smart, doesn't take my shit (this is key when dealing with me) when I get frustrated & basically doesn't have the bullshit my usual choices come with.
Where is the bad here you ask?
I feel like a sellout.
It's so cliche. The rich older guy with the younger woman. Granted his last 3 girlfriends have been under 30 so he must be doing something right. Not to mention my best friend has always had me pegged to marry older & wealthy.
I feel like a victim of sociobiology. He wants a younger attractive female & I aspire to want whichever male will best take care of me. This is so not my nature. I like being an independent woman who can take care of herself without a man. I adore them. I want to get married. I just don't want to forsake myself in the process.
At least this one doesn't juggle...as far as I know.
So, here's to you Mr. Robinson, coo coo ca-choo.
As usual I was trolling over at Collar Me when I got a chat invite from random guy X. He has tried to talk to me a few times before. I blew him off for one key reason: He lives in New York. I have a complex about New Yorkers. They are always suspiciously drawn to me. I don't mean a little bit. I mean in a way that has me convinced if I were to walk down the streets of NY a mass of men would be hurling themselves at me. This may sound a tad arrogant, but I assure you it has nothing to do with my looks. Outside of thrid world countries men are not likely to lineup for my attentions. That being said I think New Yorkers have a sixth sense about my bitterness. It seems to be the only place where my sarcastic & pessimistic nature is truely appreciated. Go figure.
Back to random guy X...I turn down his chat request only to get an email. This is not wholly uncommon. Submissive men tend to be a lot like stalkers in their level of determination. He simply asked 'Why not?'. I explained my New York phobia & also politely pointed out he is 4o (making him approximately 14 years my senior). This was not even remotely effective in diswaying him. In an attempt to dodge my NY issues he announced that he had actually just moved back there from silicon valley. I have a severe weakness for northern California. It is the only place you can hit a winery and a leather shop in the same afternoon.
And so begins the story of Mr. Robinson...
We began chatting about a month ago. I talk to lots of people online & don't think much of it. It's like cheap entertainment. However, much to my chagrin this one managed to hold my interest.
Here is what I know so far: He is attractive, a Jewish Atheist, a hot shot salesman who is well off & a Princeton graduate. He majored in physics, used to play competitive chess, never married, one daughter who just started college, loves to travel & he can cook (A major turn on for those of us who grew up mastering the fine art of microwaving). Oh yeah and kinky. There are a bunch of other things, but those are the basics.
Our first phone conversation was 5 hours long. He was in Hong Kong at the end of October & bought me a present. He wanted to fly me out to New York. I passed for now. I prefer disaster happen on my own turf. He is seriously too good to be true, but I have yet to find 'the catch' so to speak. As my best friend pointed out I've gotten mooney over him.
The problem is I don't want to be mooney over him. I want to hate him & leave him in New York. This is not what is happening. Quite the contrary actually. We have a lot in common, he smart, doesn't take my shit (this is key when dealing with me) when I get frustrated & basically doesn't have the bullshit my usual choices come with.
Where is the bad here you ask?
I feel like a sellout.
It's so cliche. The rich older guy with the younger woman. Granted his last 3 girlfriends have been under 30 so he must be doing something right. Not to mention my best friend has always had me pegged to marry older & wealthy.
I feel like a victim of sociobiology. He wants a younger attractive female & I aspire to want whichever male will best take care of me. This is so not my nature. I like being an independent woman who can take care of herself without a man. I adore them. I want to get married. I just don't want to forsake myself in the process.
At least this one doesn't juggle...as far as I know.
So, here's to you Mr. Robinson, coo coo ca-choo.
posted by Knina at 11:42 PM
7 Comments:
I don't know you but the question I have is:
since when do you care what the hell anyone else will think?
If you like him, you like him. Wouldn't finding out later that you were "a trophy girlfriend" be better than avoiding him because of the slight possibility?
If he were 65 instead of 40, or if you were thrust into the role of being "mother" to his daughter, then that might be a bigger deal. If you were "his little whore" then you might have some issues with that.
But "selling out"? Shoot, better to "sell out" than to "settle" for someone who is nice but has serious financial or criminal problems, etc.
Be selective but don't shoot yourself in the foot before you take the tiger by the tail and run with it.
As usual you make a good point. I guess it is a little silly to aspire to guys who aren't good enough for me instead of one who might be too good for me.
The strange thing is I don't care what anyone else thinks. I'm more confused by what I think of myself.
Maybe 3 years of therapy wasn't quite enough. :P
Princess, if you're a sell-out...then I'm a sell-out and you know what? I'm not a sell-out! Do what ever the hell you want and make no excuses, have no regrets. It's pretty much been you m.o. for most of our friendship and I wouldn't have you any other way. But by no means are you to change or bend yourself...in the bad way, to please him!
You totally need to join the bitch club.
I actually just left NYC and got more play there than I have in Texas in like FOREVER... Nice blog. Keep writing!
Therapy schmerapy. I mean go if it helps, but don't forget to enjoy the moment. If you feel all giddy and out of control, relish it. Better to be excited about something that "might not be" than to be bored and tired of life.
Who knows, perhaps he'll enjoy watching you smoke with your foot in his mouth. There are worse things :-)
Most blogs fail my "Who gives a fuck?" test in 14 seconds. I spent 10 minutes with yours. When that happens, it's generally the writing...
I'm a guy in my 40s who lives in NYC. Don't worry though, I'm not hitting on you. What I will do, though, is point out the downside to Mr. Robinson, and actually there are 2. (You'll thank me some day.) (1) His last 2 girlfriends werew under 30? THis is called a pattern. This man trades them in every few years for a newer model. I assure you, his next two gitlfriends will also be under 30. (2) Look at a map. NYC is far away from Wisconsin. Look, I've had plenty of these. We're talking, great romantic weekend in Manhattan. It will be a blast. But then, cut and run.
This advice is nearly as good as the sun screen.
Oh, one more thing. Regarding your August post about the 3 stages of a sex life? There are way more than 3 stages. The one you are in now is the 26-30 stage.
Cheers.
Actually you can be a Jewish Atheist very easily. I've met many. Judaism is a religion & the followers are Jewish. However, Jewish also refers to an ethnic group. I'd think with a handle like private intellectual you'd know that.